Generic Store-Brand Apes – #19

// begin chat log

LEAD ARTIST: So we’re bootlegging “Apes” now, not Punks? I don’t really understand —

ISIS: You don’t need to “understand” what you’re drawing, just get the interns to draw me 10,000 monkeys by tomorrow so I can get my job back.

LEAD ARTIST: But won’t it be confusing if my artists already got the brief to draw the Punks and now you’re completely switching it up on them like this? And confusing to the people buying these things??? I don’t think these drawings are going to turn out well.

ISIS: You act as if that is a problem that I care about…

LEAD ARTIST: I, uh —

ISIS: The exec team said I could have my job back if I deliver ten thousand monkeys by tomorrow. I don’t care if you get the artists’ kids to start cranking these things out. In fact, that’s actually a good idea — do that… Now, excuse me this anti-anxiety medication that I downed is about to kick in. I’ll be asleep for about 24 hours. I better have ten-thousand gorillas or whatever out of you all by then.

-Isis Sakura, Former Head of Marketing of the Bootleg Products Division – International Megadigital



NEW MEGADITIAL APE-LIKE PRODUCTS

I guess we’re making apes now? I promise that no artists died in making sure these Apes were completed on time*. One day, you’ll learn to hate punks and love apes. I know that I have. So today is the first day of the rest of your life. I uh — don’t know what else to write here. I’ve got to get back to drawing…

Limit 3000 per customer.

Sincerely, Unpaid Intern.

Collection: Rejected Bootleg Punks by International Megadigital

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